The Absent-Minded Serial Killer

“You don’t have to do this, you know?” the girl pleaded as she struggled against the ropes that bound her to the tree. Bastian would have taped her mouth shut, but he had forgotten the duct tape.

“I do have to do this,” Bastian said calmly. “If my parents hadn’t named me after the main character of The Never Ending Story, then I wouldn’t have to do this.”

“What?” the girl said, confused.

“This is what you get for silently mocking me!” he yelled, and reached into his coat to pull out his pistol.

“Um…crap,” he muttered as he continued to shuffle through his pockets. “I could have sworn I put it in my jacket before I left the house. Dammit! I can’t use anything else; I might get blood on me!”

The girl continued to struggle against her bonds.

“Look, ” Bastian said, “I’ll be right back. Stop struggling. Don’t go anywhere or I’ll kill you.”

He stumbled a few times as he hurried to his Camaro and peeled away. Since he tied her up with a bow knot, the girl escaped before he got back.

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