“What the hell were you thinking?”

The machine was silent, offering only a slightly energetic twinkling of blinkenlights across its diagnostic panel as evidence that the question had been heard.

“Well,” the operator sighed, “I’m waiting. Explain yourself.”

“You’re quite impatient for a human. Did you know that?”

“Yes, I’m well aware of my own psychological parameters. Stop evading and give me a dump of your own.”

With a theatrical sigh rendered in its richest vocal textures, the machine unloaded a compact state vector onto the operator’s handheld.

“Huh. That explains the cheeseburger in your vents, but not the panties.”