I learned a long time ago that when caught in a dream that you can’t wake up from, you should just play along. Talking snake in a toilet bowl who slithers into the bedroom to read a newspaper – Yeah, I was pretty sure this was a dream.

So I walked out, playing along with this surreal situation. “So let me get this straight…”, I said. “The world is about to have a crummy day, I am the only one who can stop it, and you had to approach me while I was still in my bunny slippers. I suppose I needed a talking 6 foot snake with a toilet fetish to tell me this so I would believe it?”

The snake just looked at me, mere slits peering over the newspaper. “I can wait until you are properly attired..”, he said, adding, “You need to be quick as we have a meeting scheduled here in 15 minutes”

I was sure I had mis-heard him. A talking snake who reads newspapers was one thing but one who conducted business meetings in my living quarters? The only thing missing was dark glasses resting on the bridge of his nose.