The last living Martian struggled to the surface in time to see the humans of Earth open a shopping mall on what was once his people’s sacred burial ground. He wailed and broke down, crying out a last song for the passing of his beloved civilization. A passing Network executive liked what he heard and hired the Martian to host a talk show on daytime TV. The ratings were quite good despite of the language barrier issues. The last Martian left the show after nine seasons, but is still active. If you’d like to book him for an appearance, contact his management agency in New York City. I hear he’s awfully nice in person. Even you can’t understand a thing he says.