“Why Paradise?” Asked the young CNN reporter.
“Why not?” Responded the developer, suave in suit and tie, “It was for sale, cheap. But let’s not talk about what was here before. I’m holding this press conference to announce to the world that the Paradise Mall is now open. I hear there’s a great sale on indulgences over at the Rosary gift shop.”

Another reporter, grizzled with ink-stains on his fingers spoke. “But what about accusations that you purchased this property from Satan himself?”

The developer allowed himself a slight simple. “As I’ve said before, I can’t really comment on the circumstances of the sale. As you folks have reported yourselves, though, leading theologians seem to be indicating on a recent reorganization in heaven.”

The reporter interrupted. “But what can you tell us?”

The developer’s smile shrank, indicating a disappointment in the media. “I’m sorry. I’m contractually barred from answering that question. Since we seem to be rehashing the same questions, shall we start our tour?”