some of the tenses are weird but good story

um… i don’t get it… i mean it’s very nice… but who gave her the cruel note? Other than that… I like the tension you feel as she is opening it…

aww,man that gotta suck

and she’s late for class, double burn. Ouch. Good read.

good story. you grab the readers attention and you take them on a lil ride.. well written. good job!

I don’t mean to be harsh here, but while it’s a nice little story, there’s just too many grammar mistakes for me. Tense is all over the place, sentences are awkward (I think middle schoolers use contractions more often than not), and comma usage isn’t that great. And what’s the point of there being a lollipop inside the card if it’s a cruel note, anyway?

I thought it was great. It seemed real, like it could have happened to my friend in grammer school. Good Job!

i think it was a little odd and didnt capture me enough but im sure you have more then enough comments here to be able to ignore me!! sorry =]

I liked it. The grammar and spelling mistakes i was able to ignore. I actually read over most of it to get to the message in the card, and was unfortunately disappointed. I was hoping it’d be something more cruel which would have made the candy an even better touch. But that’s just me being evil. good job!

lol… Tarmaie I liked that… “But thats just me being evil.” lol… that made me smile today!!

ummmmm i didn’t get it

lame.just LAME .