“There’s somebody at the door!” The chant was inane and insanely irritating. It caused him near physical pain, these days, and that was before he even opened the door.

“Good evening, sir.”

The dark suits, crisp shirts and quiet, respectful voices were decidedly not what he had been expecting. Nor the horde of youths around him, who fell suddenly silent, under the faintly malevolent gaze of the visitors. Even the bird weighing down his arm resisted his traditional attempt to attack new arrivals.

“Er… hello?”

“We were wondering,” said the first man, earnestly, “if you were aware that it was Ash Wednesday, today?”

“Ash Wed… What?!”

“The first day of Lent,” the taller, previously silent, partner explained. “It’s a day of fasting and contemplation of one’s transgressions.”

“Look, just who are you?”

“Have you been contemplating, sir?”

“No. Look, could you just go away please. You’re, er… you’re scaring the children.”

The men looked confused.

The old man, in his bright blue, coat was entirely alone.