Why is it so hard to find the right words to say? To find any words at all! Why does it seem like I’m the only one with this problem?
I hate to be alone with one person. It doesn’t matter who it is, boy or girl, adult, teen, or even a five year old!
I fear the awkward silence that always inevitably comes. I don’t fear the silence itself, but the impression that it leaves on the person I’m with. I know they feel awkward, sitting there in silence, and it makes me extremely uncomfortable.
Frustrated, I search my mind desperately for something to say. Anything! Just a few words to break the silence. But like always, my mind is blank, just when I need it the most.
I do my best to plan my life around avoiding such situations. I never go anywhere unless there’ll be a lot of people, and I prefer to spend my free time alone rather than risk the terrible silences that may arise from inviting a few friends to spend my time with.
How does everybody else live without this fear? Why am I the only one? No one understands.