UsagAI is very useful. He wakes me up in the morning and gives me a run down of all of my to-do items for the day, then reminds me a half hour later when I forget them.

He sorts through all of my feeds and hands off only those news items that directly fit my interest criteria. He can place calls for me, and schedule appointments, making sure to annotate them on my personal and work calendars.

He is often more obdurate than I would like, reminding me of things that I had already acked. But sometimes I need a gentle push to keep me going through the day.

UsagAI keeps track of my purchases, and warns me when I’m going way off budget. He also knows what’s in my fridge, and when I go to the grocery store, he silently prints out a shopping list for me whilst perched atop my hat.

I think it’s fair to say that I do not know what I would do without him. He entertains me, he takes care of my finances, he makes living in the world easier than it should be.

The one thing UsagAI has failed to procure for me is love.