Ficlets

The Greatest Debate Ever

“Are you ready?” the moderater asks me earnestly.

“I think so,” I answer, opening and closing my hands nervously.

“The cameras are all set. Audio pick ups are strategically located, so speak freely. You’ll have 17 minutes. The announcers are warming up the crowd now,” he says all this more to himself than to me, checking things off his list.

“They’re all in there?” I ask.

“Yep, all the lawmakers singled out by the investigatory committee as the worst offenders in terms of pork barrel additions to otherwise good legislation.”

I nod, “Perfect.”

“And they’ve all debated on the topic before, so be ready for a lot of double talk and sideways speak,” he adds, a hint of encouragement in his voice.

“I have a few things prepared to say.”

“Really?” He seems genuinely surprised. But he just shrugs and cocks his head to one side as a message comes to his ear piece. He nods and looks at me, “They’re ready, sir. Good luck to you in there. Here’s your baseball bat. Swing away, sir. Swing away.”

View this story's 5 comments.