Open, read, categorize, file.

Boring as it may sound, I have several reasons to spend as much time in the mailroom as I can. Amanda promised she would send veiled encouragement weekly. We agreed, no more than two randomly addressed letters a week.

I have yet to knowingly discover one of her letters, so I wonder if she’s tried too hard to be discreet. Truly, my most important reason to monitor and censor mail, is to find out details about the members of the cult, especially the guru, Paulo. I’m at ground zero and this cult will fall, as long as I don’t mess it up.

The Antichrist is certainly not very awesome, I thought to myself after reading yet another boring letter addressed to Paulo. This one apparently from his mother. Where did she go wrong? How could he grow up to be such a monster? And would he be home for dinner Saturday night?

A hypocrite with Mommie issues; that’s all he was. That’s when I found it, a letter addressed to John Brown. I opened it, hoping for encouragement.