If you’re reading this, you’re totally screwed, and you probably know it. I didn’t, at first.

When I got here, He met me. He never introduced Himself, but I knew who He was, all the same. “Welcome,” He said.

“Where am I?” I asked Him, somewhat confused.

“You, my friend,” He said with a smile, “are in Hell.”

At first, I was stunned, speechless. I had died? And gone to Hell?! But as I looked around, I thought, That can’t be true.

“If this is Hell,” I asked, “why is it so beautiful?”

“Oh, you’ve been caught by the Lie we tell humans,” He said. ”’Hell is fire.’ ‘Hell is demons torturing you, day after day.’ The closest to the truth is, ‘Hell is separation from God.’”

“Then what is the truth?” I had to know.

“Hell,” He told me, “is separation from everyone. You are alone, for all eternity. They all go mad, eventually. But, for some, madness brings insight. And insight sometimes, sometimes, brings escape!”

I’ve found that escape! But I won’t tell you how! You’re not insane enough to understand. Yet.