It wasn’t his fault, wasn’t hers either, I guess. Just that when he was brought up, women liked to cook and sew, were quiet, reserved and well-mannered. Men were able to be a bit boisterous, order the fruity chicken for her at dinner, talk condescendingly to her about problems with her car. It’s just how it was.

So when he took on raising the girl, he fed her what he thought was appropriate: princess movies with pale, quiet, unassuming women. Women as fillers in school who never asked questions and only went to school for boyfriends and home-ec. Women on shows like the bachelor who banked on dumb as cute and ended every sentence, statement, declaration or otherwise with an upward tilt, like asking a question. Even if it wasn’t a question? A cute little emphasis? This was what misunderstanding and macho assumptions about female upbringing wrought.

So when she started welding in the garage with an instructional library book, she got beat. Caught with a beer in the basement, she was grounded and slapped.