A promising beginning. You set up the hook for a potential story very effectively.
I like the first line.LoA
A nice job of suggesting a situation and then keeping inside the character’s head. First paragraph you say ‘extremely’ but then didn’t put in the adjective? Just wondering.
OO! mah bad. thanks for pointing that out!
Robotech_Master
Lone Writer
THX 0477
Mask By The Moon