If I could do one thing for you it would be that you were able to be truly happy. With the way that you talk I know that you can’t be happy with what you are doing. You are giving up something that makes you happy. I know you don’t like how you two met but you miss him and I have never seen you miss someone like him. I wish I could make you see that what you want is ok. But that is why you are you and I am me. The out looks on life come from the differences that we have had in our lives. And I wouldn’t change anything that I was taught for me but I would want to teach you the things that I have learned. Just be who you are and be truly happy in life because what is the point of hiding yourself and being what everyone else wants you to be. It is the saddest thing when people don’t really know the real you.