“It’s not like anyone’s ever gonna know what we did, I mean, who’d suspect us?”, I said to Madison, my ex boyfriend.

I was of course referring to stealing the monkey from the science lab. I named my new pet Sean, after John Lennons’ son.

Madison hated when Sean came anywhere near him. Monkiephobia? He must have had a bad experience at the zoo as a child.

“Madison, chillax, he’s not going to hurt you,” I said in hopes of calming his hysterics.

“I don’t know why I let you talk me into breaking into the lab and kidnapping.. err monkeynapping this.. this cousin of Curious George,” Madison moaned.

“Madison, I’ve told you a hundred times already, they were going to do experiments on him. It’s inhumane,” I said.

“It’s not even a human, so it’s inmonkane,” said Madsion.

I was starting to remember why we broke up.
Madison, backing away from Sean, said, “Just keep Bonzo away from me ok, If he ever touches me again, I’ll shoot him.”