Dropping to your knees in prayer, a miracle occurs! You speak in tongues. Oh, no… wait… You’ve bitten your tongue out of fear and are babbling incoherently… Never mind! It works!

The gang members are motionless, staring at you with suspicious eyes. They probably believe I’ve been touched by God, you think, with a self-righteous smirk.

“Yo, this mofo is crazy!â€? The leader declares, his hand motioning in tiny circles near his head. Clearly he believes you are simply touched in the head. Nevertheless, they leave you and the previously intended victim alone, prowling for other reckless Samaritans.

Still on your knees, still babbling, you move towards the man you so gallantly rescued.

He removes his hands from his tear-stained face, sees you and screams, “Don’t hurt me!â€?

As he reaches for his wallet, intending it for you, a police car screeches into the alley.

If you run like a scared little girl, turn to Pg 7

If you try to explain (in spite of your swollen tongue), turn to Pg 8