i feel the hope still beating in my heart
i hear you voice ringing in my ears
i smell your hair in my mind
i feel the heat coming from your body
its all in my head
i dreamt thatyou were with me, i was so happy, unbelievably so
but when i woke up i lost you all over again
im only happy when i sleep
but im afraid to see your face in my mind again, knowing that in a few hours itll be gone once more
i sit up at night, writing, somethings with a purpose, others that mean nothing at all
i need to do something, at all times, there is no rest
rest just leads me into a false sense of happiness thats taken away with every morning
i cant stop thinking
cant stop hoping
of you
for you
im not pleading with you anymore
im past begging
im not trying to guilt you
im stuck in limbo
trying to move on, trying to do whats best for you
but im too god damned selfish to leave you
and im to god damned selfless to stay
its my fault for giving you my heart, cause now im torn between desire and my pride, and love