Good! I like it. The one part I am questioning is: “Um…well, actually, we lost all communication after they split.”
I wasn’t sure if he could see through our lies -
It’s just that they really HAVE lost communication with their mom, so having the bit about seeing through lies right after that line doesn’t make much sense to me. Maybe you could add, “That was the truth, but -” Well, whatever. It’s very good.
emma jo_234
More Than Meets The Eyes
emma jo_234