Why did I say no to God? Does he resent me now? Can I fix what I’ve done?
A small voice inside of me says I can, but my heart seems to be sinking from the heavy weight of my sadness. I am a lost spirit, outside of my body, screaming to get back, yet I feel like I’m walking away, letting myself fall further and further away from what everyone saw me as… Nothing can change my world, I feel… My friends call to me longingly, hating to see me slipping away so quickly… I pour like sand through their fingers, and fall into an endless desert surounded by the rest who have fallen… There is no relieving water here, only the blaring heat which burns my heart.

I dont want to take anyone down with me, but I long to be saved… and to think, it was me who’d saved nearly all of my friends… Now I’m sinking just as they had, even further than some. But perhaps I should let these scars on my hand rule me until death.. something says no, and tries desperately to pull me back. I need a savior…