I remember my first day of boot camp.

“Regulation 36-2903 – what is it Heaton?!”

“uh, don’t know, Sgt. Sutton.”

“Why do you not know?!”

“I don’t know, Sgt. Sutton!”

“I’m going to ask you again! Why don’t you know?!”

“Because I’m stupid, Sgt. Sutton?”

“Brilliant answer, Heaton! Because you’re IQ is only slightly higher than plant life, please allow me to enlighten you. Air Force regulation 36-2903 is the Air Force dress code. Do you stupid knuckleheads understand me?”

“Yes, sir!” the classroom full of head-shaved men responded.

“T-shirts can be white, green or brown! Jockey or boxer shorts are authorized clothing! Socks – black only! Shoes – low quarters or combat boots! The Air Force wears bloused pants under field positions. Males must wear a belt with everything. Females only wear a belt with fatigues! Do you want to know more?”

“Yes sir!”

“Then read Air Force regulation 36-2903! It’s not story time and you’re not children any more. Momma isn’t here to tuck you in either. Do you understand me?!”