like a virgin oooh-ooh-oooh

lol.

I couldn’t help but think of a quote from the princess bride movie: “What is this? Are you trying to trick me? - Where’s the sports? - Is this a kissing book?”
I like the way you delved into his thought process after the kiss.

I like it, but I would add the word “back” to the final sentence to make the kiss seem that much more reciprocal.
That kooky Karl! Wasn’t he supposed to be comatose again? :D I’ll address that in my sequel.

Beyond sweetness. I liked the sense of swimming and isolation between the two that’s then jarringly disrupted as Old Bess yells out.

Sequeled!
And I forgot to say I love the description of the kiss in the first pgh.

You described this so well that I could actually picture their facial expressions and everything going on in the bar at the time.