Reposting my comments from the other one:
Holy cow! Definitely did not expect that. Really messed up, but I dig it. A few little grammar mistakes here and there, but damn. What an awesome entry.
Thank you very much for taking the time to enter my challenge.

wow no way! Didn’t see that coming.

That was an amazing twist!

Kinda makes me want to go take a shower…

Very unexpected twist!

I could have sworn I already commented on this one. Either way, my comment would have pretty much been a ditto of what Orange Oreos said – simultaneously gross and well done.

Woah.
Unexpected, but yeah, gross…
Really well written, too.

i am disturbed by this i feel like i need to take a shower or call my therapist. i am sure that was the desired effect so good job.

Wow, that is an amazingly gross twist. Completely unexpected, and so well done!

LoA

lmfao, holy crap.

Oh…my….god…
I really wasn’t expecting that… I feel all itchy now… I was just reading this and then when I saw the last part I was just…completely caught off guard… I was imagining this going on between me and my guy…and then him turning into my dad at the end… I was almost ready to cry it was so awful…

But despite the slight trauma I endured… I still enjoyed this very much.

Ugh. I almost gagged. And I was blown away by the twist at the same time.

* gags for air * Amazing ficlet, anyways! The fact that it happens makes it even worse! But, great entry.