I squinted at the light as the first rays of morning sun hit the eastern side of my tent and I could feel dawn’s warm fingers caressing my face.

“Stop that Dawn, that’s inappropriate behaviour and you know it, you can’t caress your superiors awake. The manual clearly states alarm calls are to be done by bugle.”

“Sorry Sir.” She did look sorry, she always did but she never changed her ways.

“How’s the battle been going these two hours I’ve slept?”

“Quite well Sir.”

“Which side are the 14th Battalion on a the moment?”

“Well Sir, they were with us up until about an hour ago but they went over to the Prussians for a bit, at the moment they’re fighting for the Spanish.”

“The Spanish aren’t in this war!”

“No Sir, it’s not going well for them.”

“Well let me know when they’re back with us, or if they join the French. Have the Italians surrendered yet?”

“Two days ago Sir, before the battle, remember? They sent it by carrier dove, lovely bird, you ate it for dinner.”

“Ah yes. War is hell Dawn, war is hell.”