Friday moved too slowly for me, so I spent the day with extra shifts, making the other coffee employees very happy. But then it became closing time and I had nothing left to do with myself. I decided to relax at home, where I called up my friend, Melissa. “Hey, how’s your summer?â€? I asked once she finally answered. This better be a good conversation I thought to myself.

After all, I had already listened to the extended and unedited version of “Sexy Can I” that played as I waited for her to pick up. I was about to screw over T-Mobile for cursing Melissa with the ability to pick a song to torture callers with, but I decided against it.

“Mine’s been good, what about you?â€? she replied. I could tell she was probably pigging out on the couch with a bowl of ice cream.

“Well, just guess who I’m going out with on Saturday.â€? The idea was practically creating butterflies inside of me.

“I don’t know, just tell me.â€? I could see her rolling her eyes now. Melissa is extremely predictable if that wasn’t already obvious.