Ficlets

The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Became An Evil Overlord, Part 16

77. I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerously unbalanced structure.
78. If I’m eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.
79. I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex.
80. I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, e.g. “Align the 12 stones of power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total eclipse.” Instead it will be more alone the lines of “Push the button/”
81. I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly grounded.
82. My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them.

View this story's 4 comments.