I actually landed on my feet this time. And you know how I keep getting these plans to calmly and logically go through these situations? Yeah, all that crap went out the window when I saw where I was. “Ok, the first test: not so bad. The second test: bad but it was bearable. This however-”

“Is what the Tester has chosen for you,” Tristan began in his most preachy voice. I hated that tone. It always made him sound like some Grandpa talking about how you had it bad? He had to walk 15 miles in the cold. And snow. And that was just to get his shoes! And then- “I do not!” However, Tristan lost the preachy tone as he explained what to do. “All you have to do is make the volcano around you,” and he needlessly gestured around him to where they were standing (for those of you who aren’t the brightest crayons in the box: we’re inside a volcano!), “not explode when it’s ready. So you have, oh say, 5 minutes to prepare yourself. Good luck!” And he cheerfully started to drift away.