i.
Ah, about time this happened.

ii.
I remember making a bet with Saturn (it wagered the rings) that the little things on that one little watery planet would try to put a stop to this, or at least delay it. I didn’t think that I’d actually win.

There’s a little blotch on me now from their little warhead. Kind of like those moon craters. Honestly, you’d think they’d let me go gracefully.

iii.
And they blew themselves up. I won’t miss the little buggers.

iv.
I’m glad that everyone else seems to be taking this rather smoothly. The whole red giant thing a rather trying process, but they seem happy enough to be reduced to their molecular components.

v.
I was wrong. Pluto sling-shotted not too long ago – said he was going to see the universe. Eh, we never did think that well of him either.

vi.
That whole expanding deal took long enough! Now I get to curl up nicely into a hyper-condensed ball of mass. Never a more divine rest, can’t think of a better ending.

Saturn’s rings are delicious, you should try them.