“You vant to know vhy I’m he-ya?” asked the large metal structure.
The rock mass sighed, “Why not? I’ve got nothing else to do.”
“Oh goode, be cause I vas goving to tell you anne vay.” The tower happily replied.

“Eet all started een 1889 vhen du Prince of Vales, also King Edvard de seventh, selected my design out off ovah 700 admitted to de International Exhibition off Paris,
und THEN Gustave Eiffel-”

“You want to know what I’M in for?” the man interjected.
“Oh but of course! Wi monsieur! Vhat has placed you een dis garden off pleasures?”

“Streaking.”
...