The park is infested with people. Me, a willing volunteer of the infestation, is sprawled across a blanket.

It appears to be a pleasant afternoon. I seem to be relaxing- and to the untrained I am. But if you were to take a closer look- my clenched jaw, flinching eyes- you might get the sense that something is not right.

Which would be correct. In fact, since I have begun sunbathing I have fallen victim to a bully. This creep comes around every five minutes, makes me nervous and uncomfortable, then vanishes. Its wreaking havoc on my nerves, and I am almost ready to surrender. Throw up the ol’ white flag and go rent a movie.

That is why I asked my friend to help. He is walking up to the blanket, plastic bag in right hand.

I greedily take the bag, peeling off the plastic to reveal my secret weapon. My last chance at a peaceful afternoon: a flyswatter.

“Its pink?â€? I crinkle my nose in disgust.

“Its all they had- just be happy you have it!â€?

“testingâ€? I yell outloud and hit him on his head.