Hello, Kitty
“It’s a cat.”
“No it isn’t, it’s a lion.”
“Nah, it’s a cat. Look at it lying there, it’s a cat.”
“Uh, uh. Something that big has gotta be a lion.”
“Of course it ain’t dimwit. Lions roar, have big teeth, yawn a lot. I’ve seen ‘em on Discovery ain’t I?”
“You mean that ain’t a lion?”
“Nah, it’s just a big wussy cat. Harmless, couldn’t bite you if it tried.”
“So, if I go pet it…”
“Nothing would happen to you, nothing. ‘Cept maybe a scratch or two.”
“Well, I like cats…”
“Go say hello to it, maybe they’ll let you take it home. Rescue cat, you know.”
“Well, Hell, I can give it a home.”
“Yeah, you should, give the poor kitty some good looking after.”
“I’m going, ain’t gonna let them treat a poor pussy like that.”
“You go, you show them how a kitty should be treated.”
“I’m going.”
“Wowser, you show them, Bubba.”
“Here, Kitty.”
“Cute kitty, isn’t it. You’ll be a good owner.”
“Here Kitty, h—.”
.
.
.
“You know, that there’s one mighty fine lion.”