I realize what I have to do as the water drains….drain him away….drive him out of my heart. The next day, I see him, and I could barely look at him without feeling a sense of…disappointment, like a child that let’s down their parents. This feeling pursues me all day until I lie in my bed. How long is it going to take to push him out? Why does it feel like it’s weighing me down like an anchor? I realize that I no longer want to look at him and feel anything. I hate myself for still feeling yet…..I toss and turn, finally giving in to sleep.