You Know It's a Good Party When...

by THX 0477

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Eyes wide, Malcolm sat on the couch staring at nothing, saying nothing. All around him lay the detritous of yet another fabulous party. The walls of the hotel suite were ripped, dented and smeared with pate. The furniture, what was left of it, was overturned or covered with semi-conscious revelers. The floor was a sea of cans and bottles wherein swam pizza box whales.

Those who could do so began to stagger out of the room. Cleaning up is for suckers or hired help, after all. They all gave their compliments to their host, the illustrious Malcolm, star of stage and screen. Jokes were made. Innuendoes were butchered. Crass comments flew like rice at a wedding.

Finally, the slowest of the departing guests, a rotund, red-face man, gave the door a heavy slam as he left, partially because he was falling forward and still had a hold of the knob. With the reverberation of the door or perhaps the guest’s impact on the wall, Malcolm tipped and toppled off of the couch, having died several hours earlier.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 4.5 stars out of 5

  1. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 10 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Ending was funny. pizza box whales ?? funny line, but I dont know what it means lol

  2. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Alexa ♥'s Buddy Icon Alexa ♥

    Posted 10 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    It does sound like a great party.

    I love this: “Jokes were made. Innuendoes were butchered. Crass comments flew like rice at a wedding.”

    and: “Cleaning up is for suckers or hired help”, which is so true!

  3. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Kiarra's Buddy Icon Kiarra

    Posted 10 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    never been to a party like that, lol

  4. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    FlirtingWithaBrickWall's Buddy Icon FlirtingWithaBrickWall

    Posted 10 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    detritus
    good word

  5. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    DisassociatedWord's Buddy Icon DisassociatedWord

    Posted 10 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    wow. ending is kind of creepy.

  6. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    artistsrunwild's Buddy Icon artistsrunwild

    Posted 10 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    oh i love it

    so funny and completely true
    [from what ive heard]

    i second alexa’s comment
    the rice line was the BEST !

  7. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Charlotte Scriversi's Buddy Icon Charlotte Scriversi

    Posted 10 months ago

    It’s hilarious. And I loved the sea of cans and bottles/ pizza box whales metaphor.
    And I have to like the crass comments line (even if it reminds me of the guys in my English class.)

  8. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    blueyedwonder's Buddy Icon blueyedwonder

    Posted 10 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    i lOVED the sea/whales metaphor!!!!! and the crass comments line! however, didn’t really understand what the meaning of him being dead means.

  9. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 10 months ago

    Wow, I really like all these positive comments, especially since it took me so darn long to get around to doing this challenge cause I was so stuck for an idea.
    And to answer Blueyedwonder, the idea behind him being dead was that everyone is leaving and thanking him like they care, but he’s dead.

  10. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted 10 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I third Alexa’s comment. Those were great!

  11. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    awesome you made the Featured Ficlet with one of your Best ficlets. Great aprty, great ficlet.

  12. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    horrorfan13's Buddy Icon horrorfan13

    Posted 9 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    This is really good and I quite enjoyed it! I’m interested to see where it goes.

  13. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    YodaOnCrack's Buddy Icon YodaOnCrack

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Party on, dudes! Rockin’! Nice feature ficlet!

  14. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Alexa ♥'s Buddy Icon Alexa ♥

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Congrats! You’re the Featured Ficlet!

  15. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Ighnot's Buddy Icon Ighnot

    Posted 9 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    Oh man, you were there, too?

  16. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    A Clockwork Apple's Buddy Icon A Clockwork Apple

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I’m in love with this. I’ve read the last paragraph over and over again. You could not have worded it more perfectly.

  17. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Kevin's Buddy Icon Kevin

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    The perfect ficlet-pithy, witty, and funny.

  18. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Shadow's Buddy Icon Shadow

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Funneh… well written, good job.

  19. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    User 5719's Buddy Icon User 5719

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Excellent work!
    This piece really sums up the fakeness of high school and for many who still haven’t grown up college, too. If people could only self reflect every day and really learn from their experiences….

    Oh, and about your about the author post, you must have just read the allagory of the cave. :)

  20. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    livcrump's Buddy Icon livcrump

    Posted 9 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    I’ve been to slammin’ parties like this, but no one ever died. I’d like to see where this is going…

  21. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 9 months ago

    Wow, thanks for all the nice comments. Gee, I’d like to see where this is going too! Cause I have no idea.

  22. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    User 5731's Buddy Icon User 5731

    Posted 9 months ago

    Okay, lets start with:

    And to answer Blueyedwonder, the idea behind him being dead was that everyone is leaving and thanking him like they care, but he’s dead.

    Wtf does that mean? Is he actually dead, dead asleep? Thanking him like they care, people normally thank the host for letting them basically thrash his place.

    BTW , are you in high school? Good write but it seems like you are practicing. Plus you use big words but you need to learn how to spell them or you look like an idiot instead smart.

  23. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Bigkittyproductions' Buddy Icon Bigkittyproductions

    Posted 9 months ago

    Yay party!! I like how Malcom was dead

  24. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    User 5743's Buddy Icon User 5743

    Posted 9 months ago

    3.0 out of 5 stars

    I dont think that this was intended to be humorous, forgive me if I’m wrong, but the words you have selected make the overall tone very negative. I think you did a pretty good job though…

  25. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    User 5744's Buddy Icon User 5744

    Posted 9 months ago

    1.0 out of 5 stars

    WTF ??? This shit didn’t make sense. I clicked on the lick thinking it would tell me how to throw a good party, after all it was under news stories with a picture of a real party. VERY DISAPPOINTED :[

  26. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    User 5746's Buddy Icon User 5746

    Posted 9 months ago

    whoa. confused. too kme like 5 tries to read it and figure out what actually happend. creepy at end. i was like what…dead? huh? red faced ,man killed him. i predict.

  27. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    User 5757's Buddy Icon User 5757

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    You are an excellent author, please comment upon my sequal. (its not much but i wrote it in like five minutes… lol)

  28. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    FourSeven's Buddy Icon FourSeven

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    The unregistered users who have reviewed this piece in the past 12 hours are morons. Ditto for the people who still dont get it even after the clarifications. These are the people who read Lord of the Flies and go, huh?

    The pizza box metaphor was perfect. Also, I think this works best as a short little story all on its own. To extend the story would be to tarnish what you just put together. Like what, are we going to chronicle the walk home? The clean up? im getting cut short..haha, ficlet nirvana

  29. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Sailor Emo's Buddy Icon Sailor Emo

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I really liked this one, but the bad comments only enhance the good ones and shows who has taste and who doesn’t.
    This doen’t seem like a high school piece
    It does make sence
    It was not a negative vibe
    and if you want to know how to throw a good party ask google!

  30. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    Howie Amourscow's Buddy Icon Howie Amourscow

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Great piece of work. Clever, amusing, and interesting.
    (I did want you to know that I sequeled BfE’s awful piece, not out of disrespect to you, but out of respect for how amazingly bad BfE’s piece was – the bad of an Uwe Boll or Ed Wood movie. Brilliantly, cluelessly, inept.)
    Keep up the good work!

  31. You Know It's a Good Party When...

    shi's Buddy Icon shi

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    i loved that story dude !!!
    so true !!!

    - shi

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