Identity Crisis (out-of-order challenge)

by Mistress Elsha Hawk

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“Unit 56” the dispatcher’s nasally voice crackled over the CB.
“56” I responded.
“Accident on the Interstate, Eastbound, mile marker 44, multiple victims.”
“Copy.” We turned on the lights and siren and sped our patrol car around toward I-19.

When we arrived on the scene, smoke was pouring out of both mangled vehicles. A semi trailer was blocking one lane of the road, while a fire truck, barely arriving ahead of us, blocked the other and was emitting firemen as well as water.

The semi driver crawled out and was tended to by EMTs. A car was upside down in the median, four people inside. Someone in the back was wailing. The driver in the front was very bloody and not moving.

Two people were pulled from the wreckage within minutes, each with something broken. The third passenger and the driver required the jaws of life to remove. The driver hadn’t responded.

Two IDs were recovered, one to a brunette, 23, 5’4”, 120 pounds. And the other to a brunette, 22, 5’3”, 115 pounds. One of those two were driving.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 4.5 stars out of 5

  1. Identity Crisis (out-of-order challenge)

    John Perkins' Buddy Icon John Perkins

    Posted 4 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    This seems incredibly similar to my out-of-order submission. I would attribute that to the whole “great minds think alike” thing, if I were in fact, a great mind. =P
    I like what you’ve done here so far, and am looking forward to find out how this plays out.
    One issue I have is that it feels like you had more to say here than you were able to in the alloted space. I think this would have worked better as two separate entries, to help flesh out some more of the details.

  2. Identity Crisis (out-of-order challenge)

    Mistress Elsha Hawk's Buddy Icon Mistress Elsha Hawk

    Posted 4 months ago

    I agree, yet I wanted to get to the meat of the story, not bore you with details.
    I did cut some stuff. :(

  3. Identity Crisis (out-of-order challenge)

    Ana Cristina's Buddy Icon Ana Cristina

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Wow. This is quite a start. Interesting how almost all (if not all…) of the entries have had violent “beginnings.” I guess because of the whole Pulp Fiction thing, maybe. OK, time to stop babbling and click on the “sequel” button!

  4. Identity Crisis (out-of-order challenge)

    Ana Cristina's Buddy Icon Ana Cristina

    Posted 3 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Congrats! You won an award in this challenge!
    http://ficlets.com/stories/34540

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