Ficlets

Not You

im not a writer, i’m just doing this as a birthday present for my husband he loves this site and wants us to be dorks together. geez. im an overworked wafflehouse waitress by night, drunken sleep-deprived zombie by day, i have several seperate addicitions (such as drinking far too much and chain smoking, off-brand energy drinks and general debauchery) about a hundred irrational fears,(like internal noises, the general welfare of my brakelights, white noise in the dark) a myriad of nervous habits (i.e. flipping cards, peeling beer lables, popping gum, blurting out random things,and folding my paper trash). if i could be a superhero i would be hamtaro and save the world one hampster at a time or johnny the homicidal maniac before he turned all good. I think it would be neat to have a mysterious past. my husband is mighty joe who is an extremely handsome and talented writer who smells good. i have a little dog named weasel who is smaller than a crackbaby and loves to try to lick your brain through your ear canal. gross but i love him.

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