Why can’t they see me? I’m trying, trying to make it through this, but I need someone to help me. I need someone to look beneath the surface, and truly see me. Why can’t they see how I’m falling? I just need someone to catch me.

Every day seems to blend into the next. I can’t breathe, can’t see. It’s all gone black and white, and there’s nothing I can do to change it. My insides feel all contorted; I no longer have control over my body. I don’t have control of anything.

Memories overwhelm me, following me in my dreams throughout the night. I don’t want to remember. I want to get away from them, but I can’t. Can’t run. Will they always haunt me?

The smile I plaster on every day is fake—can’t they see? Yet I don’t think I want them to…I’m so confused. Will it ever be crystal-clear?

Yeah, I just need someone to catch me.

They tell me to take risks, just take a deep breath and jump. And I did. But what they can’t see is that now, I’m falling without a parachute.