The great thing about Vlad’s Castle was that it was easy for an escaped prisoner to get lost, so we could bet that our escaped virgin was still wandering around trying to find an exit. The bad thing about Vlad’s Castle was that it was also easy for vampires to get lost.

“Did you ever think of putting subtle markings on the wall so that you could could find your way around this place?” I asked, as we rounded a corner.

Vlad shook his head and said, “It wouldn’t work. There’s a spell on the castle that makes it’s structure shift around. I usually get the butler to lead me where I want to go. He always knows where to go.”

“It shifts around? Like Hogwarts?”

“Like what?” Vlad asked.

“You know, Hogwarts. The school in the Harry Potter books,” I replied.

Vlad stopped walking and looked at me. “Harry Potter? Jesus, Ross. Are you sure you’re not a Modern? I might have to take your cape away.”

“Hey! Eternal life can get boring. I’m running out of things to read.”