Connie Chung: What did you just do?

Jesus: My first miracle. Didn’t have quite the intended result so I figured I would take it back and try something else.

Connie Chung: Am I to understand we are your guinea pigs? Where is your kindness and vaunted ‘humanity’?

Jesus: I figured this is only just after my last excursion to Earth.. Listen… It took you guys a bit of time to learn about me, it is going to take me a bit of time to learn about you without Dad’s help. However, I have a quota I have to make on this trip. I failed miserably last time despite following all my Father’s directions and death just really doesn’t suit me. I mean.. We can play the “kill me, I rise again, kill me, I rise again” bit, but it gets really cliche and isn’t very nice on my wardrobe.

Connie Chung: Wait a minute. Did I hear you say, “I’m not going to ask for God’s help at all this time.”? He could give you insight so you don’t have to experiment with us like this.