The door slid open and the family of five stepped out, smiling and fresh-faced. Too fresh-faced, actually, more like fake.

“All right, Mrs. Watkins, if you could step in now, we can complete your operation,” said the doctor, smiling with plastic teeth at the elderly woman.

“No,” she said in slight disgust, as if unbelieving her family had even done it.

“No? But Mom, that means we’re going to outlive you and – ” cried the mother of the family.

“No,” Grandma Watkins repeated.

“Mrs. Watkins, please reconsider,” pleaded the doctor. “The door to a longer life is right there.”

“Listen, I’ll kill myself right now just to save myself the trouble of repeating myself. No.”

The family looked bewildered at this response. Who wouldn’t want to live another hundred years?

“Mom, please. It’s only a little – “

“Disgusting,” Grandma finished. “That’s not gaining life, that’s throwing it away. I’m going to stay nice and natural. Eighty-three is old enough for me.”

The doctor sighed and showed them out.