But we worried about our choice of lawyers. Sure, he was eager to handle the case – we thought it was for fame, but it turned out he wanted to win so he could go to his next law school reunion and basically flip off some professor. Problem was, we hardly saw him while we waited for news about our case. Then we started worrying he was nuts.

First, he’s tied up in some messy divorce litigation. It sounded reasonable until he told us the Frankenstein hadn’t really died, so the ninth ex, who had some kind of deal with HarperCollins for a book called If I Did It Again And Again And Again With Various Power Tools, was claiming he didn’t owe his client back alimony.

Then his next excuse is he’s representing some woman for Failure To Fence A Drake and she’s facing banishment to the Dungeons Of Yarbouth on top of judgments for millions of Crowns and a breach of contract suit filed by a “Country Steak House” (I think that’s what he said) that thought she was bringing them a hungry dragon. Okay. That was crazy talk.