That was difficult.

I love the line about the shoe. She was sounding pretty hot, in a naughty librarian sort of way, right up until that ketchup/egg/toothless fiasco. Effective.

That’s exactly the picture I wanted to put into your head.

very descriptive! can see her in my mind, well done.

i agree with thx’s naughty librarian thing. very morbid and disturbing in a sense.
LoA!

hahahahaha, thx—the toothless fiasco he says. I got the impression that she was a gothic chick becuase of the black hair that shone deep purple in the light and red shoes. And then I was thoroughly thrown for a loop and just as thoroughly repulsed at the ‘french fry fiasco’ at the end. But still it’s pure description done well.

twist included it was very well written. Your descriptions were right on. I was not sure at first if you were describing a painting or if you were describing a person. But the ending cleared that up quick. Very interesting challenge

The plastic bench threw me for the loop. :D loved the picture you’ve painted here.

Ewwww – ketchup and egg AND toothless. I usually don’t give criticism but I have been reading a lot of comments that have been really picky lately and I can’t believe no one mentioned that she “bushed” her hair, that her glasses were on “her” front of her nose and that her dress was “rinding” up her thighs. Also the letters “where” still legible. All I can say is “Good job”. You had everyone so involved in the description that they failed to criticize! Great story though.

Thanks judee. Can’t believe I missed those. Just goes to show that a spelling checker isn’t everything.

Wow, that was amazing.

Though incredibly disturbing, bleh… toothless!

LoA

I’ve always liked black hair that is so black it’s almost blue, or in this case, purple. Very vivid imagery!