It’s hard to separate the two “me’s” now. There’s “Before You” and “After You”, but the two have become like one. You’re never truly gone. My memories of you, your influence, your power over me, have fused these two together; one soul, one heart, one mind, instilled with your very being.

This is an outlet. If I spill these thoughts, if I bleed enough onto paper, can I get your essence out of my blood?

When will it be enough? When will I have suffered enough, written enough, cried enough, let go of enough that you will be gone, once and for all? I’m trying to find that breaking point, the place where I’ve had enough of you, and I can actually let you go. The place where you cease to exist within my words, my thoughts, my writing, my heart.

I’m still looking for it. When is it enough?