The best advice would be to structure your thoughts, as they end up being mashed together. Also, it might help to write a story or two in the 3rd person, rather than from your perspective.
Number one thing you should work on is capitalization. This will help your reader see where each new sentence begins. And I recommend separating this into different paragraphs.
this is good, maybe you need to structure your writing. Paragraphs, capitalization, dialog, and details. It makes the story easier to read and the reader enjoys it more. Good job!
problematique <3
problematique <3
Krulltar
♠Ana Cristina♥
problematique <3
Writer4Life00nj