Meanwhile: Even Superjudges Get the Blues


Dear Brian,

By the time you read this, the children and I will be gone. I’m so sorry for doing this, but you and I have just evolved too far apart. After 16 yahren of marriage, I’ve come to the realization that I just don’t love you anymore.

I’ve met someone new Brian. He is a primate from a world called Earth. He treats me like a female needs to be treated, Brian; he doesn’t ignore me like you do. My lover touches me in ways you never have; he and I experience very gratifying lovemaking. The surgeries required to compensate for his fascinating external sexual apparatus were well worth it.

Apparently, my lover is well-renowned in some parts of the the Galaxy. He is a scientist and adventurer and possibly one of the most intelligent of his species, having invented a method of transversing time. His name is Lemuel Gulliver Gates, but I call him Lemmy.

I love him, Brian.

I hope that you will understand and not stand in the way of my happiness.

- Martha

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