Great, simplistic/minimalist start to it, though it still sets the whole ambiance and setting for the piece. The whole thing has that suffering, uncomfortable, uneasy feel to it (in a good, evocative way, I mean).
Couple of nit-picky points. The whole ‘cold steel against the skin’ thing is a big cliche, and doesn’t fit (realistically, a gun in your pants for a car ride on a hot day does not feel cool). And the ragged scar contradicts the straight description of the road. Just minor things to clean up.

I agree with THX on virtually every point. Very well done. Great setting, with just a few minor inconsistencies.