Kelsi worked at Food Mart, and she hated it. They had her stocking shevles.

The day in question was a Wednesday. I only remember this because they were having a special Wacky Wendesday sale on Pepperoni Hot Pockets – the most delicious microwavable food item ever invented.

I was carefully balancing seven boxes of the aformentioned delicacy when I heard a dull thud and then shrill voice yelling in the fresh produce section.

Uh-oh.

There was a loud WHOOSH as about a hundred thousand oranges fell out of their pyramid-shaped display and thudded sickeningly to the floor. Looking up, I saw Kelsi staring daggers at a little boy who had the guilty orange in his hand.

“That little snot!” she screamed. “He threw an orange at me! D’ya see that? Do ya? Do ya?” She pointed. “He collapsed the whole DISPLAY !”

I stepped delicatly over the oranges as I went to pay for my Hot Pockets. I could still hear her muttering “Jesus, look at all these ORANGES ,” even though I was easily halfway across the store.