I don’t know why, but I seem to feel a certain way around a certain time of the evening as of late.
Maybe it’s the fact that it gets darker later, or just the issue that I’m not the same person I used to be.
Most people, at around 5:00 in the evening spend time with others, usually. They get ready to go out, sit down to dinner, or play with their kids.
Not me.
I’m in my room by myself around this time.
For some reason, I always get lost in my thoughts at that time. I reflect, on good times, and bad.
I reflect on how I could be a totally different and better person than I am now.
I think about how I basically stormed off from the place and the people I grew up with.
In some ways, I feel like something isn’t complete, I don’t feel right about a lot of things now.
Every night, I think about the few times I find love and something to hold onto, it comes and goes like a flash of lightning and the thunder.
I really don’t want to feel this way, I just want something to hold onto again.