But there is nothing for me to hold on to, nothing. I’ve read all the books about making friends. Be a good listener, be cheerful, be out-going, be friendly, be helpful, show interest in others. What a bunch of crap. I’ve tried it all, and here I sit alone in my room, friendless.

Oh, I have surface friends. Those are the ones that say hello to you in the halls or classrooms, but when it’s time to be chosen for a sport, I’m always the person standing alone at the end.

My parents think it’s great that my grades are all above average. The reason for that is—again, lack of friends. I don’t understand it. I’m nice looking, smart, (without pushing it) friendly, helpful. I bathe every day, and I dress nice.

What is it about me that puts people off? I think I first noticed it in 3rd grade, on Valentines Day. All the cards went into a box and the teacher handed them out. Out of a class of 23 kids I got 5 cards.

My destiny sucks.