“Hey, hey, monkeys!” I called to the bodies jumping and swinging in the trees.

“Hey, hey, we’re the monkeys!” they called back.

“Yeah, monkeys! Where do I find the Guru?”

“Guru, guru, guru!”

“Yes, guru! Where is the guru?”

“Guruwhere! Guruwhere!”

“Yes, the guru is where?”

“Guruwhere!”

“The guru is in Guruwhere?”

“Yes, yes! Guruwhere!”

So, I set off to find Guruwhere. I went down many a dark street and alley, accross many a shaky, breaky bridge, and down many a shady path. Until, finally, I came to Guruwhere Avenue.

“Looks like this is the closest I’m going to get.” I looked up and down the street, and I saw a dog.