First “song.” Poo. Poo, poo, I say! poo!

i like it…of course, it’s a little hard to get without a tune…i assume there is a tune if it is a song? anyway, i like it. you’re too hard on yourself.

its halfway decent. the lines could use a bit of tweaking just to help with the flow but the ideas, and most of the lines, are really good.

I actually liked it. It reminded me of Nick Drake’s album, Pink Moon. Really, it did. And if you’ve never heard it I suggest you go out and listen to it and come back and write more. Cheers!

blue-I know, I know. But other ficleteers post songs without tunes, so why can’t I? HA! Never thought of that, did you? =)
Suburban-Couldnt agree with you more. Flow…blah.
Nouvelle-Ok…Erm, I’ll try it, maybe. <: D

haha i liked it a lot
my songs usually suck so i mostly stick to poems
but u should keep up with the songs

All my songs have tunes. And when I see other peoples songs, I sing them how I would think they’d be sung. Note me for tips or tweaking.